Friday, March 21, 2008

The colors between the lines

I've only "known" for the last 4 months that I'm somewhere along the autistic spectrum (Asperger's seems to fit the best), and it's only been a little over a month since a professional agreed with me, but during that time I have been very busy "connecting the dots", as you'd say between my behavior (during childhood and now) and my autism. It's not a conscious action, but suddenly I remember things I've done, or, thing people have said I did and see a clear connection at the same time. It's eerie, in a way.

One of the latest two lines between the dots is the mall-meltdown incident I mentioned in the previous post.

The other one is more connected to symptoms of autism; apparently inflexible adherence to specific, nonfunctional routines or rituals (DSM-IV Diagnostic Criteria for 299.80 Asperger's Disorder). My mom was, when I was around 6 months old, driving, with me, to the city. The freeway we used has a tunnel. One opening for north-bound traffic, and one for the south-bound traffic. But, this day, there was some maintenance work being done, and one of the directions was closed off, and the traffic was directed into the other opening. I went ballistic. Screamed and kicked and flapped. I'm not saying "normal" kids won't, or can't, respond the same way, but it got me wondering...

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